Stop denying yourself – and I mean that literally and figuratively, and in all the ways you can imagine that it might be taken – in all its possible semantic iterations. Stop denying who you are, what you want, your anger (and other awesome emotions) your likes, dislikes, and desires. Embrace your Bad (authentic) Self and stop denying yourself the activities, experiences and sustenance that are in alignment with who and where you are at the moment. We deny the truth because it feels scary and unmanageable (sometimes even unimaginable.) We deny ourself satisfying foods, preferable activities, or general sloth like “unproductive” behavior because we think it’s healthier or noble to be good and productive in an acceptable manner.
It’s a fine line sometimes, and often difficult to decipher. Are we choosing based on past experience, external or internal shoulds, or authentic internal desire? Are we taking our cues from our habitual internal dialog, based on the ideas we’ve amassed from countless messages about who we should be and what we ought to do and want, and the dictates of our culture and society’s most recent admonishments, or are we self-determining our existence based on our trustworthy intuition? Is it self-care or self-denial? Are we not opting for the flavorful, rich, adventurous dish because we won’t like it or because we are trying to be virtuous?
The key to deciphering the motivation lies in whether the result feels like deprivation and loss. When we are listening to our trusty inner guide, respecting our best interests and taking care of ourselves, we are happy with the outcome. Pay attention to whether your intellect or the collective intellect is in charge and dictating what’s “right” and “good” for you. Listen to your intuition, the subtle feeling rather than the habitual thought. Try things out. See how it feels and respect your reaction. Try, experience, notice, learn, respect and enjoy. Fill your well! Or, as I like to say, Bill The Whale!